My eyeballs hurt.

One thing I now know for sure is that no matter how much someone tells you you're their number one, you can never really be on their mind all the time. I don't believe in love and I don't believe in friendship -- I only believe in making do with what you have here and now. Your little elementary school best friends, where are they now? Where's your boyfriend from when you were fifteen, that you swore you would love forever and eventually marry? No matter how much you love someone, you will cheat on them and they will cheat on you, emotionally or physically. It's sad, but that's the way the world is. Learn to live with knowing you will never, ever be someone's number one or only one -- It's never gonna happen.

That said, I'm thinking of what to do on my long ass two or three month break while all my asshole classmates go on to their Photography semester that I thankfully have already done... I know I'm most likely gonna sit at home and smoke pot while watching Spongebob, but before I begin I could just start daydreaming. I want a vacation. That last vacation was a complete emotional drain and just made me hate everybody. I don't want to go alone, but I can't think of anyone else to go with! Unless I go with Layne, which will DEFINITELY end up horriffic and hideous to the MAX.

Speaking of which he started an argument with me last night about how I don't like this chick friend of his. He said he had a problem with it cos I didn't have a reason to dislike her, but he had a reason for not liking my friends because "they come into your house and throw weed in your face". I told him I was not a victim of anything; if I want to smoke up I very well will do so and I don't need his permission! I have a mind of my own. If I don't feel like it, I won't. Anyway, my reason for not liking her is she appears OUT OF NOWHERE, and starts living in his apartment along with his roommates, all ALL OF A SUDDEN he feels TERRIBLE for not seeing her for one night, and he's at her every beck and call just because her house got broken into, she needs help moving her shit, etcetera etcetera. I mean, how would he feel if I SUDDENLY moved some dude into my apartment; some dude I've NEVER spoken of but seem to get along very well with?

Anyway, that's said and done. I creeped him out by being extra nice instead of stomping around the house all night in an erratic egregious fit of rage, so whatever.

Uncle Zack will be here soon to pick me up for tea at my grandparents' place -- Whooooo. Break out the cases of beer and light yourself a cigar! IT'S A PARTY AT SHAH ALAM!